I battle with my feelings about my body. Sometimes I love it. My skin looks and feels amazing. My legs looked toned, they seem to have miraculously become tanned and my stomach is flat, my hair looks amazing.
Then I have those other days, or weeks sometimes, where my face is spotty, I have flare ups of psoriasis, my stomach is bloated like a pregnant hippo and my hair resembles a chip pan.
I know that hormones are to blame at times but for me stress is a huge contributor to my body issues.
I know I’m not ugly and that is not coming from me in a big headed way, believe me I have been made to feel ugly. When you’re being called ugly every day you start to believe it.
Now I get told I am beautiful every day and I know that it comes from a place of love. So whether anyone else thinks it or not it doesn’t matter 🙂
My face isn’t the problem though. My entire body is.
I know that I am capable of changing my body if I’m not happy with it and I’m trying.
I go running three times a week. I practice yoga as often as I can. I tend to get impatient though if I don’t see results quickly I get fed up, which I know is daft, it won’t happen overnight.
I’ve started the ‘Couch2 5k’ challenge, again, which is a 9 week programme of running three times a week and it really makes me feel great!
There are moments when I think I’m going to die, then I don’t and it’s awesome.
I have seven weeks left until I can run 5k in under 45 minutes. I was at that point two years ago but I ended up with a knee injury and never got back in to it 🙁
The yoga is more of a way to relax and centre myself, easier said than done!
For some reason I started weighing myself every time I came across some scales and I think it had a really negative effect on me. One set of scales told me I weighed nearly 9 and a half stone! Bear in mind I’m only 5 ft 1 and the heaviest I’ve ever been was 12st when I was pregnant…
So I freaked out a little bit. The next day I weighed myself the next day and I weighed 8 and a half stone..I think I was using some dodgy scales but it definitely planted a negative seed in my head.
I have decided to never weigh myself again. If I feel good and look good, who cares what I weigh?
I’m not quite there yet but I’ve been there before and I can get there again.
I’ll keep running and meditating and I shall be chilled and awesome ♥
Don’t ever let anyone make you think you’re not good enough.
Follow your dreams right now! Don’t wait until tomorrow,
next week, next year. Stop planning, start doing 🙂
Be happy and keep smiling 😀